In my search for property in Salt Lake City, one of the useful (albeit not entirely accurate all of the time) tools I’ve been using is Google Maps.  Basically, if you search “real estate,” it will search within the parameters of your map window, and when you move it around, new listings will come up.

As I understand it, the way Salt Lake City works geographically is that the city itself is located in a valley up against the Wasatch Mountains.  As is the nature of mountains, fingers of mountain range project into the valley, leaving canyons between them.  “Our” old townhouse was located at the mouth of a canyon called Emigration Canyon.  (As an example of more canyons, Alta/Snowbird are up Little Cottonwood Canyon and Brighton/Solitude up Big Cottonwood.)  One day on a whim, I started searching up Emigration Canyon to see what sort of property is located up there in the wilderness… and that’s when I found BALLER MANSION.

Baller mansion has SIX bedrooms and TEN bathrooms.  But that’s not all.  There’s an in-law suite called “The Cottage”, an indoor pool, 2 garages, a poolhouse, a steam room, a theater…  in more than 12,000 square feet.  That’s like, the house I grew up in times 6.  It’s like my apartment times 12.  What the whaaaaaaat!

Here are some photos for you to drool over.  Some famous dude should buy this place and get it on MTV Cribs.

The house, nay, the COMPLEX

The kitchen. Ridiculous.

A swim in the dead of winter? Not a problem.

I don’t think it’d be super awesome to live in a place like this.  Maybe if I had a small army of staff to run it.  And unlimited funds for upkeep, heating, and cooling.  Did you notice that visible in the photo of the kitchen, there are 2 sinks, 2 dishwashers, 3 ovens, and a range with an awe-inspiring stainless steel hood?  I really want a nice hood and gas stove one day.  ONE DAY.  It’s not going to happen in the next house; Salt Lake City’s ranges are saddeningly and overwhelmingly electric.  Sob!  And in a condo, more often than not you’re going to get a recirculating hood that comes from under your microwave.  Weaksauce.

Isn’t it fun to imagine living in a place like this???  Not really how I’d choose to live my life, but it’s most definitely fun to think about.  (Besides, doctors don’t really make enough money to afford a place like this… Okay, maybe if I went into bariatrics or plastics and Husband went into sleep medicine.  But really, we’d prefer a BALLER MANSION closer to the slopes ;)